Felicia, Re-Invented (A Little.)

So this first half of the year has been a complete growing experience. And almost everyone I talk to gets an entire mouthful of me rambling and just thinking out-loud...because that's what I'm best at. If you would have asked me in January what my plans were for this year I would have told you confidently that my best friend faith and I were getting an apartment and then saving up for L.A. in which I would be re-locating to in the fall. Well that plan has made a one-eighty turn into something life-changing and completely different.

Towards the end of January a friend of mine asked me to come to this church called the anchor. I was a little weary because the last church I visited with this particular friend was not anything I liked or felt moved to join, by any means. As I walked into the church I was amazed with the culture of it...there were kids tattooed from head to toe...kids (well, young adults) with piercings, and these "kids" were what the average churchy-church would turn away. I think there's a HUGE misunderstanding between the church and the average young adult-artist where they feel unwelcome and uncomfortable when normally they're not unwelcome but the church also doesn't know how to reach out or connect with these young artists because they themselves are elders and just simply can not connect. So as I'm walking up to this church I realize immediately this is something I want to be a part of; and even more so when the worship was so filled with the presence that I had tears streaming. That being said I now go every week and I consider this my home church. (www.anchorfellowship.com) (listen to some of Josh's pod casts, they'll blow your face off)

The above being said I feel like I should re-iterate where I said with the whole churchy-God stuff. I grew up in it. Never felt connected to it. Never felt this overwhelming love coming from people that could effing care less if you have long hair or where a skirt or even have money or....there's always been this list of do's and don'ts that I associate with church. But God loves us wherever you are on this journey and doesn't hold back because your dress like this or sin more than the next person, he loves us always the same amount abundantly and unconditionally. This is something that has been re-revealed to me in the past couple months.

So growing up almost feeling the complete need to rebel against organized religion...I also lost touch with leading my life by what I'm called and lead to do. I am a completely independent girl who at times thinks she knows it all and likes to be in complete control....which is not a lifestyle that is synonymous with doing whatever God calls me to do.

All of that rambling above is to say plans have changed.
I feel lead to live with my dad for a few months, and just let this healing process that God has started completely work out until I know what my next move is; which potentially is Greece in the Fall...but who knows that could change in the next couple months.

I'm just happy where I'm at and the weight of trying to figure out my life plan is lifted and its changed to I trust God to guide me as opposed to I'm going to figure it all out on my own-it's impossible btw.

This new thing is exciting and life-changing and also everything I already new just reiterated and re-revealed to me in a way that just clicked.

Love,
Felicia-Changing.
(and change hurts....but its a good and exciting hurt, if that's not too much of an oxymoron for your brain to comprehend)